Your cat is snoring louder than your fiance sleeping next to you?
I am really trying to keep a lid on my feelings surrounding a certain topic. I'm shocked at how much of my brain space its taking up. Sleep interrupted, serving customers, even on the toilet .. Its something I don't seem to want to let go of. When I write I hate being vague as it wont make much sense to whomever is reading. Apologies.
Basically it goes into my past and that is one can of worms that could fashioned into a good read. Thinking back to how things used to be it turns my stomach because I didn't think I was ever going to get passed all the bad things that were happening to me, much less find anyone that could understand and still take me for who I am. I will tell you its difficult trying to float through life where every corner you turn no one seems to want to understand, help, be there. It amazes me how cruel people can be. I've been told that there is no use dwelling on what was, because its over, done. NO. I can tell you now that certain people have NOT forgotten and no amount of denial is changing that. Makes me so angry that I never get a chance to say exactly what I need to say when the time calls for it. I guess this is what this post is. The bitter pill thats been hard to swallow for 27 years is still stuck in my throat.
Thats all you need to know. I guess everyday I am working on the human shell that is me. Acceptance is a million miles away. "You will never get through life until you accept who you are". Thats what scares me.
Back since '99 I have been creating websites with 'blogs'. Over the years my web design skills have become a bit more than mediocre. I enjoy creating something that people find pleasing to the eye and interesting to read. In '05 I had a website that attracted 300+ visitors daily. The site was talked about on random forum boards, my designs praised on other website blogs. I then decided to go on hiatus as my life was too demanding to keep up with the daily updates and running of the website. I want that back. I want the mass of readers and emails (good and bad) back ...
FYI: I am addicted to the Linkin Park song "What I've Done". I don't know why, I just like it.
So I was messing with iMovie on the MacBook and I came up with this 'gem'. LOLz.
While most of you will read this and think I am some sort of insane person on crack (the video to follow this post will back that theory up) I am writing this for a co-worker.
"Oh so juicy?"
Saddest thing I was told this week, "Never take for granted the roof over your head, a person who loves you, the stability of a normal life. The streets these days are tough. Sleeping on them isn't an option anymore, its just not safe".
